The arrival of a biological child can be a joyous event, but for my sister Julia, it exposed a painful bias. After years of infertility, she and her husband adopted a wonderful little girl, Sophie. For three years, Sophie was her “miracle.” But when Julia gave birth to a son, her perspective shifted dramatically. She began to refer to the baby as her “real” miracle, and Sophie was emotionally cast aside. The neglect was evident in everything from unkempt hair to a heartbreaking lack of affection.
This story highlights the profound damage that can occur when parents create a hierarchy among their children, especially when biology is the dividing line. Julia’s belief that her biological son was “different” led her to abandon her parental responsibilities toward Sophie, asking me to take her indefinitely. This decision ultimately backfired.
Julia’s life unraveled as her marriage collapsed, leaving her to raise her son alone and overwhelmed. Meanwhile, providing a stable, loving home for Sophie allowed her to flourish. The situation serves as a crucial lesson: parental love should be a constant, unwavering force, not a conditional resource that shifts with new circumstances. A child’s worth is inherent, not dependent on genetic connection.
